Monday, April 4, 2011

..the fact that I care..

The fact that I care, sometimes is a nuisance to others.
You see, I love to keep in touch with others.
But not everyone love to be in touch.
How hard it could be?
To keep in touch I mean.
But then who am I to complain.

As I grow up, I tend to seek for attentions and endearments.
I mean the appropriate one. Simply because, it matters to me. To keep on living.
And I make sure that, someone I care knows that I care.
Like for example someone I know is sick or down with worries, I give smsses or call them up. To let them know, I care.
But you see, not everyone like the attention given or the thoughtfulness of the caller.
Like I said, who am I to complain?

When I give smsses or call asking how they are doing, you will be surprise not everyone that I call or sms please for what I do.
Instead I might be disappointed for the lack of enthusiasm given.
And sometimes the actions are contagious enough to hurt my feeling and rendered me with a broken heart. Soon will be a disease that yet to find a cure.

For example:

“Hello. How are you doing? Are you busy?”

And the replies might do some damages.

“Hello. I’m busy. What do you want?”
A simple answer, but it has brought enough damage to your heart.
Thus, it spreads enough injuries to the whole system.

Like I know I am nobody like you, but I never do that to anybody that I love.
Not one. It never occurs to me to reply with an acute answer.
No matter how busy I am, I will reply with much polite and respect.

You see, I was born with so many inferiority personalities.
Yes, I do feel inferior. Especially when I surrounded with so many people who success.
I don’t mean to have that feeling. But the feeling is mutual.

But as I grow up, I force myself to believe that I might be not as success as everyone, but I do have my own specialties.
So what if you earn more than me? Because deep inside my heart, I knew that I have those qualities that will never exist in your life.


I know I have been ramblings. I just have to let it go somewhere. But I know sooner or later, I will be hurt again and the quest in finding the cure begins.

p/s: Not being emotional.. just a scribble to ease the heartache...



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