Thursday, May 17, 2007

::..all the love in the world..::

I concluded something that miracly change my perception towards the life inside me. I was watching 3lbs at NTV7, (my favaurite series this days) her daughter has a mojor chronic fits that can be a fatal if she didn't receive an early treatment, which end up with surgery. Having the thought of open your brain out, really scared any alive human. Being the only daughter and child, the parents have no choice but to agreed with the surgeons.

But after the surgery, the mother do have worries. After her daughter awakes, she tend to have a lot of thoughts. One of them, she scared that the daughter might blaiming her for not being there for her and making the decision without comtemplating with her first.

Then one of the surgeon came to her and said that "your daughter has awake" All she can answer is, "i am scared of meeting her. scared what she might be thinking of me. scared that she might blaiming me for not being there for her"

But what the surgeon answer that captured my attention the most. YOUR DAUGHTER IS A BRAVE GIRL. AND THAT BRAVE HAVE TO COME THROUGH YOU FIRST, FOR THE FIRST NINE MONTHS IN YOUR TUMMY. And that does change her thoughts!

So moral of the story, I've been in a lot of mixed feelings about this pregnancy. Worries were one of them. That scariness, having to actually going to that ordeal again, does trigger the braveness in my heart. But at the same time, I am happy. But then, I am worried......again.. Worried, that I might not be able to give equal attention to the THREE of them and to me nevertheless. But later, I feel overly excited. That I might burst with excitement! And then, I feel insecure. Insecure about the how actually people around me felt about this pregnancy.. *sigh*

But later, it has been resolved. By a simple gesture and talk from my parents and family... They have been supportive and make me think that I can face whatever it is..I really can.. Seriously because I know I have all the love in the world....

Friday, May 11, 2007

::ada apa dengan APRIL::

huh tajuk ada apa dengan April.. tapi entry dalam bulan Mei.. heheh tak kisah la.. janji ada gaks entry untuk ini.. it's a special dedication to the things that happen in that month...

2 April

Birthday Mak yang ke 61. Sesungguhnya Mak adalah antara orang yang amat penting dalam hidup aku... hidup kami sekeluarga.. Dia merupakan tonggak penggerak dan nadi keluarga kami.. pada Mak kami mengadu hal... pada Mak kami kena bebel balik sebab hal yang dingadu adalah salah kami.. tapi Mak jugalah yang menjadi life saviour dalam hidup kami.. sesungguhnya aku amat bersyukur dan bertuah kerana Mak menjadi Mak aku.. I love you mother.. I love just the fact u alwez at my back when I need u the most.. Thank you for being there alwez.. for me.. for us..

My 2nd Anniversary.. Secara kebetulan tarikh nikah aku sama ngan birthday Mak.. but actually memang aku rancang untuk sama birthday ngan Mak.. supaya menjadikan tarikh tersebut lebih bermakna... Alhamdulillah.. segala onak duri dan dugaan yang melanda..telah selamat dilalui oleh kami berdua.. tambahan pula cinta terus bersemi dengan kehadiran Izzah yang amat disayangi.. Semoga ikatan ini lebih utuh dan kukuh..sehingga hayat dikandung badan..

izzah masa baru lahir

11 April
Izzah turn to 9 months.. Hadirnya Izzah selama 9 bulan ini, menguatkan lagi ikatan aku ngan Kie. Segala keletah dan kerenah menjadi senyuman dan penawar hidup kami.. no words can describe how much we love you baby.. you alwez be our baby no matter what.. no matter what may come.. kami sayang izzah....

14 April
Anniversary Mak ngan Abah yang ke 39! Happy Aniversary Mak & Abah.. Well dah wish sebenarnya..tapi saja jer nak sebut lagi semula since i'm doing this entry..Sebenarnya aku amat kagum dengan relationship abah dan mak.. aku hanya harap dapat menjadi another abah dan mak.. applying the secret of yours in my relationship with Kie.. semoga aku menjadi sekuat dan setabah Mak dan abah.. Aminnn...!

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